Friday, November 20, 2009

Thanksgiving


Well Thanksgiving is only a few days away and it will be my first one at home in .two years. I've really been too busy to think much about it. All the new furniture got put in a few weeks ago we have a whole new sound system, we are getting a new wall in the back of VIP that will look really kewl… Sometimes I’m not sure what I do with my time but it flies by really fast…


I’m getting back to the gym to drop the 15 pound I’ve put on since I got out…It takes a chunk out of my day to hit the gym but it makes me feel much better. Also, I live in the world of perpetual 20 year olds. When I’m in shape, I don’t feel near as old as I really am.

I’m getting really happy with the feel of the Yellow Rose lately. We’ve been in the same building for damned near 30 years and we will never be new and shiny like some other places in town (the building that is our girls are always shiny). So we really make up for it in personality. I know that sounds weird, but if you have 50 people in the room with positive energy, everyone else in the room can feel it. When I came back from prison, the club seemed to be in a big funk. We literally had to start rebuilding from the ground up. You go from a staff that is used to being asshole to elbow busy to staring around a mostly empty club wondering WHAAA HAPPEN??? Pretty much, as soon as I came back business improved… but I didn’t help it stay that way. I should have been thankful that I was back, thankful I had so many friends, thankful that I had this great staff who had been with me for years… but some how was all escaping me. Instead, I into one of the tyrants that kept me under their control for the last two years.. I found myself treating my friends and colleges the same as I had been treated by the guards in prison.



I’ve never been one to give much credence to post traumatic stress…until now. But that is what the diagnosis was… In June I hired my best friend Don King back. I heard that, at one point, Ricky talked to DK and said, “You gotta come back you are the only one who can control him.” What a sad fucking day when some one who you know and respect has to say that about you. Well soon after DK came back I had another melt down and sent out an email to my managers that was, the say the least, degrading and demoralizing… It is something that I will for ever be ashamed of… Well DK pulled me aside and jumped up my ass the way only friends can do to other friends… and what he left me with in that conversation is what I would call a pivotal moment in “getting myself back” after two years of being locked up. He said to me, “Mike positive energy is infectious, what do you hope achieve sending out a memo like that. Does it make you feel good to make the people who love you feel like shit?” I reflect on that moment a lot. “Positive energy is infectious” Just keep telling your self that because it is true… I’m not completely fixed, I still have my moments but I try to stop and remember “Positive energy is infectious”.

The room feels a lot different at the Yellow Rose now. If you’ve been coming there you already know that. Now you know the story. On December 1st I will have been out of prison for an entire year. I will have a lot to be thankful for next week….